Friday, April 15, 2011

The Right to Choice of Parents

Studies document that children can reason
and make decisions by 3rd or 4th grade.
Children who are orphaned or of divorced parents should be given
the right to choose their foster/adopting parent/grandparent.
As it is now, the decision of who parents is a one-sided decision:
only the potential parent chooses the child.
Decisions should be on both sides.
Children younger than age 9 or 10, even babies, know and intuit
the quality of potential parent-caretakers.
More studies that prove this would be beneficial in supporting this right.


The Right to Choice of Parents for children must be
included in
the Rights for Children.


42 comments:

Rosa F. said...

I completely agree. Some people think adoption is like buying shoes on Amazon; you get to pick the one you want. Well, what if that child doesn't want you? It takes both parties, child and parents, to make a family. Therefore, both parties should have a choice. --Rosa F.

michelle said...

I agree! children should have the right to choose their parent. I've seen adults with children at stores and malls, they do not care who see's them, they will mistreat their child infront of a crowd. and lets not start with having your child on a leash like a dog! they are children, not animals that can be tamed! kids, who are raised in a bad household or with no parent at all, should have this right because children need parents who love them and what the best for them... not parents who do drugs and are mindless!

and another thing, I believe people who want to have children should be evaluated first, to see if they will be a good parent to their child!

-michelle

Anonymous said...

The "for children who need parents" part is important. I agree, a child is not incapable is sense, judgement and reason. Like mentioned in the previous post, we can often get immediate good and bad feelings about situations and people. Adoptive children at a certain age I believe are entitled to a say in who is adopting them? Especially in a certain case between two options.

surfershoes

Anonymous said...

After hearing the presentation in my class,I found it so interesting how a classmate of mine was able to find such interesting information. I had no idea that children could choose to emancipate thier parents. Which is why I strongly believe in the right to choose your parents. Children deserve to be happy. If a child see that their living conditions is not fit then they should have the right to choose another family.

Francisco A.

Janet Almonte said...

Society has proven to our country that children should have the right to choose their parent since many parents have been negligent to their children in many ways. There are factual stories in our media of how children are mistreated and abused sexually and or treated like animals for the sole benefit of the parent. We see cases of children who are tied up in chains, locked in closets, tortured with various devices and not fed to name a few factors of such circumstances. Its should not even be a question that children should have the right to choose their parents rather it should be a lawful judicial statement.
Janet

Anonymous said...

I agree with this post a hundred percent. While I was reading this post,I felt so sad about some children that live with irresponsible parents. Kids should have the right to choice of parents.

Claudia B.

RV said...

I also agree that the child have to be part of the decision and it should not be just assigned to some parents like a pet.

Renata said...

There are many children that are not satisfied with their foster parents for many reasons. Sometimes foster parents do not connect with children the same as if the children "choose" them. I agree with this right, and I believe that many children would be happier if they were able to choose their parents and have a deeper connection with them.

Anonymous said...

Children should definitely have this right anlong with a say in choosing their parents. Even at an early age, kids have a great sense of intuition and should be allowed to voice their thoughts and have them taken in to consideration.

Eddie M.

Nicole said...

I agree that children should have the right to choose there own parents up until a certain extent. Parents are supposed to be role models who set good examples. Unfortunately we live in a society where we have parents who are addicted to drugs, alcohol and child abuse. Although it takes time to really grow up to be able to make sound decisions it does not take long for a child to realize the negative that they are sounded by. In many ways the right to choose your parents is giving the right to many children to finally feel loved and at peace.

-Nicole Chaplin-

Anonymous said...

Children who are being adopted should have a say in who is adopting them, especially if they have spent time in a foster situation with the adults who want to adopt them. However, would the child feel safe in making that choice? What options would remain for the child? It reminds me of the statistic in the homeless posting that kids aging out of foster care are a growing number of homeless. I know a family who adopted two girls they had fostered. The girls begged to be adopted, and once they were adopted the older girl became unmanageable and ended up in a group home. There are no answers that fit all situations.
Gabe

Johana said...

If a child is to keep alive his inborn sense of wonder, he needs the companionship of at least one adult who can share it, rediscovering with him the mystery of the world we live in.The children should have this right.

tiffytiff305 said...

There are many orphans that are given to bad parents. Most of the time the child can sense when someone is a bad person. When making a choice for adoption, it should be a mutual understanding.

Anonymous said...

From my experience, if a child spends time with a person, they normally can sense if they are good or bad. Children without parents should be involved when fostering is considered. There should be a connection.
LP

deltoroclaudia46 said...

I agree with this right since there are many cases that the child does not want to go to their new home for some reason that they only know. Since they have no choice they have to go and the child ends up abused or something worse. There have been many cases on the news with cases like these. So why can’t the child have a say whether or not they want to go the person or couple that chose the child. As long as the child is capable of make simple choices i think that child is able to choose who their new parent’s maybe.

Anonymous said...

I completely agree. Children should have the Right to Chose Their Parents but with some guidance. Children are very innocent and naïve they should have someone guiding them in the right direction, even if this means a counselor at the foster facility. Adults now a day have children as a payroll deduction. This is completely uncalled for. Children grow up and become adults one day and they need someone in their lives that is going to make a difference. When people go a foster home to choose a child, they are going for the smaller, cuter, less broken one. This should not be accepted. All children should have the right to grow and be in a safe and loving home. If adults have the option of picking the kids as if it was some type of raffle, the child should have the right to say, yes I feel comfortable and want to be with them or no, I have a weird feeling, most of the time our intuition is right. Children should have the right to choose their parents when faced in such horrible situations.
MelB

Ingrid J. said...

I certainly agree that a child in the 3rd and 4th grade or sometimes even younger, according to the maturity of that child can have a say in who is to be their adoptive parents, other than just the potential parent-caretakers making that sole decision. It can be traumatic or even ruin a child's life if they end up with the wrong person or with someone they do not like . If I was a potential parent I would certainly welcome the rejection of a child than have them hate being with me.

Jenny said...

I agree with this right! I definitely believe that children should have the right to choose their parents. Children have a great sense of intuition for determining whether a person is good or bad; for that same reason, they should be authorized to choose people who make them feel safe and comfortable.

JR

Espy said...

I do agree that a child should have the right to choose their foster parents. The feeling has to be mutual though. These decision can turn for the worst for both the parent(s) or the child. Any of you ever watch the movie "Problem Child"? Well, I would hate to be the parents that got fooled into loving a possessed kid like "Junior".

Esmeralda A said...

I also agree that a child has the right to choose their parents. Especially a child who lives in a foster home definitely has the right to choose their foster parent.EA

Anonymous said...

I totally agree with this right, if kids could choose their foster parents they would be happier. Gary Norris

Pedro said...

Children that are in need of parents should have the Right to Choice of Parents. When children are being adopted and are taken into care of new parents there rights should be like all other children. This means that a child can make a choice and pick parents by whatever age that is possible for the child. The way it is now, adoptive parents choose the child. I believe it must be decided between both sides. P.L

Terrance Carter said...

Sorry! I totally disagree that a child at any age should be able to pick a parent. First, children will almost always choose the easy route and that is a road to destruction. Next, kids do not have enough understanding about life to choose parents that are helpful for their future. Finally, most children will base their decision on what they see and completely disregard the intangibles.

Anonymous said...

Some children have the misfortune to have parents who are drug addicts, alcoholics, and/or are abusive. Under these circumstances, any child has the right to choose if they want to be around parents who follow these kinds of footsteps. Instead of being the child, the child will end up being the parent. Children should not suffer and see their parents struggle or treat them less than humans. On the other hand, orphan children should have a connection towards an adult who is in the process of adopting them. Not only can the parent choose what child they would like to adopt, but the child should feel safe and happy going into this new home. Just because children are underage, people assume they do not know the right decision. Based on the house hold the child is within, the behavior of the child will reflect. If they are unhappy with their parents, the child might go through emotional problems. For the sake of the child's wellbeing and growth, children should have the right to choose their parents.
-Shivani

daili7599 said...

I too believe that children should have some say on what foster parents they should have. Children are capable of knowing whether a certain individual is going to be good for them or not. This goes specially for children who are older than 5, because I have seen with my own eyes how smart children this age can be.
-D.Diaz

Anonymous said...

While everyone should share equal rights as people, it would be unwise to allow children the right to choice their parents. True as it may be, that children can make decisions from a young age, a child cannot make the choice in deciding which parent would be best for their wellbeing.

-F.C.

Patty. D said...

Its really hard to say the right to chose your parents. Where there are tons of foster kids, and fewer people wanting adoption. If a 10 year old kid does not get convince on his or her future parent; the kid should decide who to be with. Especially today's children are extremely wise and they have a well intuitive sense of discernment.

Anonymous said...

Usually a child does not have much say in which they get to live with. Nevertheless, it would be up to a judge to decide or not to decide to listen to the child's requests. But, I strongly agree in allowing a child to pick their parents for the reason that they have this 6 sense of knowing if the parents they are choosing are right for them. You just know. E.S.

Anonymous said...

I totally agree with this right but I also agree with Janet in the sense that we need a better justice program. There is a lot of kids that are being abuse and our system doesn't realize the abuse until is too late. That is why I agree that if kids are being abused or neglected they should have the choice to choose another parent and the Department of children and families should keep a very close contact with adopted foster kids. Laura R.

Miglaude said...

I think it is an agreeable proposal that an infant can have right to choose his parents, but I am wondering if they are enough ready for choice at these ages for real. I agree with the right that children can choose their parents. They face things that other children their ages have not faced. For this reason, they may need good family circles because they have no one to really care and look out for them like a relative. They do not have any specific principles set in life .The orphans in a community need all things that they do not receive in their lives. One out of the many things mislaid in an orphan’s live is a family. Orphans do not have a mother or father in their lives to direct them. As a result, they are free to choose their parents, however with prudence because they are too young.

Anonymous said...

I say it depends on the child. There are some that won't be able to undertake such a decision. But as long as the child seems, acts, and proves to be mature enough to make the decision then they should have every right. At least have some sort of input. -- KB

Anonymous said...

When we first mentioned this right in class I did not think that it made any sense for a child to make such a decision. But as we spoke about the age limit and how a child gets that “vibe” with certain people, I began to become convinced that maybe the Right to Choice of Parents would better the lives of many children. Children that are neglected or abused in a household definitely deserve a better home. -v.p.

TrustMeImADoctor said...

A child does deserve the right to choose their parents. Moving from one foster home to the next is very stressful, on top of the stress that was built up on the original loss of family. If a child can choose his foster parents and truely be satisfied with his/her choice then they should definately be allowed to have that right.

Rhonda said...

Well, this is a little touchy. I believe the child should have the right to interview their proposed adopted parents. I am not so sure that they are capable of choosing their parents. If HRS counselors and adoption agencies are not good at selecting and interviewing parents, then will children be?

Luisa Isla said...

Children should play a role in choosing their adoptive or foster parents. Rising a child is a tough job to undertake, and if the child does not feel comfortable with his or her new family then they should have a right to voice their opinions.But a child should not be making such a decision so young. So the decision should not completely fall on the child, but it should still be considered.

Luz Mery said...

I agree with this post for a child to be able to choose a parent. But I do think that the parents as well should be interviewed and even supervised to see how they treat a child. Every child deserves to be put with a loving family.

lachinita520 said...

Orphaned children after a certain age when they’ve reached a concrete state psychologically speaking and are able to make reasonable decisions, they should be able to opinionate on the choosing parent but not have the right, If the right existed then children of biological parents would have a choice to also choose whether because they don’t like their parents or unnecessary reasons. – D.T

kevin0121 said...

Children should have the right to choose their parents. Foster children should be able to choose if they want a loving family or not.

Anonymous said...

I agree because children are human beings too eventhough, politically they don't have a say in the world because they are not legally 18. Children follow intuition unlike adults who follow reason. If Nada just say, Alright sweetie, good to know we're on the same page then. See you when you get home! you have a feeling about something, you should follow it. Being a parent has a big effect on a Childs life, that if the child does not like the parents they are more likely to rebel against them.
CR

Anonymous said...

I personally think that children are not capable of making such an important decision. If there are parents looking to adopt it should be because they want a child to give love to, and to give all the family things that they need. Children are not mature enough and sometimes they are capricious, so I definitely think that this right should not be given to children. Parents should "choose" the child they want to become part of their family.

H.D.A

Anonymous said...

The right to choice of parents is a very difficult choice to give to small children. I believe that at the age of 4 or 5 a child doesn’t have the capacity (be of legal age) to decide what parents are right for him or her. The legal age in the U.S.A. is 18. I do believe that a 13 or 14 year old should have the right to voice their choice in court and be heard by the judge before the court makes a final decision on the adoption. However, the decision should not be entirely based on the opinion of the child. In some cases, like the case were the two siblings were killed by the adopted parents the children’s concerns about their adopted parents should have been addressed by the court. Maybe they would be alive today. L.B.J. R.

Adrian del Pino said...

I agree. Children that don't have parents should have the right to choose their foster parents. Children by the age of ten or eleven are old enough in my book to know what they want from mommy and daddy. With that said it would still be wise to find good suitable parents to raise young children. Parents that have good stable jobs, a house to live in, and time for their children.

AMD